4 Masculine Archetypes To Become The Man Every Woman Wants
Are you the man every woman wants? In this episode, tune in to learn the 4 main archetypes of a man and how each archetype influences sexual dynamics, relationships, and personal growth.
Whether you are ready to expand your sexual repertoire or you want to connect with a new part of yourself and your personality…this episode is for you. Tune in to explore these archetypes, understand their impacts, and learn how to integrate them into your life for a richer, more dynamic existence. Lets get some!
Key Topics:
00:00 Who Are You in the Bedroom?
00:15 Exploring the Four Archetypes
03:36 The King Archetype: Leadership and Stability
07:22 The Warrior Archetype: Courage and Discipline
13:13 The Magician Archetype: Wisdom and Transformation
17:37 The Lover Archetype: Passion and Sensuality
21:40 Integrating the Archetypes: A Balanced Approach
27:30 Expanding Your Range of Expression
Resources
King, Warrior, Magician, Lover: Rediscovering the Archetypes of the Mature Masculine by Robert Moore
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Episode Transcript
[00:00:00] Take a moment and answer this question. Right now.
Who are you in the bedroom?
Who do you show up at us when you're having sex? And is it the exact same every single time? In this episode, we are going to break down the four main archetypes of a man to help you identify. What archetype you are most embodying how this is impacting you and your sex life and tools to step into to create a more balanced and fully expressed version of yourself. Welcome back to the naked connection. This is the show that supports driven men to reach sexual mastery and build deep connections. What's up, it's Kiersten your soon to be sex therapist. And I cannot wait to explore these arc types with you because chances are. You are stuck in a certain way of being. Whether you're used to your same routine in sacks. The same positions.
You have the same [00:01:00] playlist. You do that all in the same order. You have the same energy about you. It's all the same. And that gets old. It gets old for you and it definitely gets old for your lovers. Okay. And sure. Maybe you like that, maybe the way in which you're showing up is really great, but. Isn't there more to you than that. Don't you want to see how else you can show up?
There is nothing worse than being stagnant and staying the same. It's like being a dead. Pool of water and the only thing that's coming, your way, his mosquitoes, and a bunch of algae. Okay. We do not want that. We do not want your sex life. We do not want your life in general to be a pond that is not moving.
We want you to be a waterfall. Gushing flowing waterfall. Okay. So you guys. Let's get into it and let's definitely get [00:02:00] some.
The four main arc types of a man are the king, the warrior, the magician, and the lover. Each represent different aspects of the mature masculine man [00:03:00] and this, these arc types. And this whole conversation really comes from the book by Robert Moore, literally called king warrior magician lover. It is an incredible book that was written about a thousand years ago.
Now it's a pretty old book. And to be honest, it's really stood the test of time. And I think it's going to have so much value for you to take away from today I actually just started reading it and thought we have to discuss this because it's so interesting. And I think it's going to be so and everything that comes from this conversation is really going to help you become a better lover, become the next version of yourself and really master yourself in a sexual space, in a romantic space and just in life in general. Woo. Okay. I'm excited for you if you can't tell today.
Um, so understanding and embodying these four main archetypes is really going to profoundly impact your relationships and your sexual experiences. We're about to explore each one in detail and really see how they manifest in your intimate connections. [00:04:00] Okay. So first. Let's get into it. Let's talk about the king. So the king archetype represents leadership. Responsibility and really benevolence and in a relationship, a man that is embodying and really fully stepping into this king archetype is going to provide a sense of order and stability.
He is taking responsibility for the wellbeing of himself, of his partner, his family, everybody around him. He. Makes fair and just decisions and really creates an environment where others can flourish. Take a moment and think about, is this me? Am I living that right now? Presently in my life? Or how am I showing up as a king?
Or maybe where am I not showing up as a king? When we look at this sexually, the king archetype. It's going to be really confident and self-assured in the bedroom. I mean, he's a fucking king, right? And there's a lot of focus on. Mutual pleasure and satisfaction. And this type of a man and [00:05:00] really. He carries the ability to create a safe and comfortable space for profound sexual exploration. And I would also add this type of arc type.
This man that's the king has a sense of really entitlement to his pleasure and entitlement to being balanced with generosity toward his partner and towards himself. So do you have king vibes? I cannot wait to know. And I think if we were to put this into an everyday example, let's say. Here we go. We have John. He's a 45 year old business owner.
He leads a company and he's leading with this fairness and this powerful vision. He's creating an environment where his employees are thriving. Everyone is living into their passion and their purpose. Largely because he inspires them to do at home, he's the steady rock in his family, he's providing this emotional and this financial stability and this really [00:06:00] foundation that allows everyone in his family to go out into the world and flourish.
And yes, he makes decisions with consideration for everybody's wellbeing and for himself. And he takers. Extreme responsibility for the outcomes. If you were to think about that kind of vision of what that man looks like, maybe, you know, someone like that, maybe that is you. Maybe you're sitting here saying Kiersten I'm John, how did you know this about me? That's amazing.
And if you're recognizing them, maybe this isn't quite you, here's a couple of steps. Here are a couple of different ways that you can step further into being this king archetype. Practice making decisions with confidence. So being really concise and really decisive. When you make these decisions and really making them with a greater good in mind.
Really actually imagined that you are the king of your world, that you were the king of your land, that you're the king of your job, your business, your team, your relationship, your family, you are the king. And. [00:07:00] As the king, when you make these decisions, you're also taking responsibility for your actions. So a great way to do this is to create structure and routine that really benefits you and benefits those around you.
So if you feel like your life is a little bit chaotic or you're moving and flowing in a way that isn't so structured, actually put those guard rails in place for yourself. And I would say. Actually regularly reflect on your values. So set some time aside, if you want to step more into this king archetype. To really get clear on what it is that you value and then check yourself to see. Are my actions aligning with what I value. Okay, so that's just. A quick moment into the life of a king.
Okay guys. And next we have the warrior archetype. So the warrior archetype. Is a man who really represents courage and discipline and assertiveness and [00:08:00] interrelationship. Man, that is really channeling this warrior archetype. He's going to be protective and he's going to be defensive and defend those that he loves. He sets and maintains healthy boundaries and he really faces challenges head on. And also he shows loyalty and commitment.
So think about this, you know, a warrior is going to be committed. Yeah. He's going to be committed to his king and his kingdom. And he's going to show that he's loyal to that. He's going to show that he is loyal to the world that he sees in values. And a sexual dynamic. This warrior man in this warrior energy really translates into actually incredible passion and intensity in love.
Making. This is a man who has the courage to really express his desires and to be open, to trying new things. He is willing to be creative and go there. And he also has the discipline in mastering sexual techniques. So think about this. A lot of the episodes we've had so far on this show have provided. Techniques that you [00:09:00] can actually implement into your daily life.
And a warrior is going to look at that and he's going to take those techniques and he's going to execute on them and he's going to be committed to them, you know, think about an athlete. They're in such a warrior mentality. They're really disciplined in their physical training in there. And the way that they show up in the world and. And that is synonymous here with a warrior when it comes to sexual mastery and techniques.
So also I would say that this warrior man, he is going to protect his partner's sexual boundaries. While also asserting his own. So he's going to be deeply protective and also incredibly assertive with what he wants. If we were to put this into a real life example, let's imagine that. Maybe I'm speaking to you.
You're the warrior. Your name has Michael. You are. You're a 32 year old firefighter. Okay. And you're disciplined in your physical [00:10:00] training and you're really courageous in the face of danger. And in your personal life. Your loyalty, your friends and family, and you're always ready to defend them when needed.
You know, I kind of think of this as, this is the guy that when you go out with your friends, if someone's being picked on, or if someone's picking a fight, like you're going to show up for him. You're not going to back away. You're going to be there. And this is someone who he's not afraid to have really difficult conversations and set clear boundaries.
There is a sense of fearlessness that shows up, but in a really, when it's in a healthy and clear way, it's also coming with that boundary.
If you are listening to this and you're recognizing, Hey, I actually am not really living that much in, in the warrior that I want to be in the warrior. That I can be. Do this. Really, and this might sound silly, but it's so true. Start to develop a regular [00:11:00] physical routine. Exercise, work out, build strength and discipline into your life. Practice standing up for yourself and also practice standing up for others when you're in there in a challenging situation. You know, what comes to my mind is there's that TV show where let's say that there are actors that are living out in the real world. And they get into a big fight or an altercation or someone does something that's just really morally wrong. And then they we are filming to see if any of the bystanders are going to come forward and actually stand up for whoever is. You know, being harmed or hurt or said mean things to in the dynamics.
The person that comes forward. That's the warrior. That's the person, the man that's going to be saying like, no, this is not right. I am here to protect. I am here to fight for what I know is right. Practice doing that. If you see something out in the world, That isn't right. Stand up for your stand up for it and say something.
Get involved. Okay. And also really, [00:12:00] if you want to become more of this warrior, man, cultivate really deep, committed, and loyal relationships. And this doesn't necessarily have to be a sexual, romantic relationship. This can be. Bolstering the relationships that you have with your family members that you have with your friends, you know, when I think back in the day, people aren't going, even today, you're not going to war by yourself. You're going to war with an incredible group of men. So build that up for yourself, right? And also, this is the type of person that's really going to face his fears head on instead of avoiding them.
So if you want to become more of a warrior. Right now think about an issue that you are really avoiding. Maybe it's having a conversation with someone at work. Maybe it's asking for a promotion. Maybe it's. Telling your partner that you don't like something that's going on. Maybe if you're in the dating world and you're just kind of like holding onto somebody because you feel too bad about rejecting them. [00:13:00] This is your moment right now to face that fear head on. To look it in the eye and say, Hey, I'm going to address this right now. All right. I just got really pumped up.
I think I was trying to embody my. In that moment. The third archetype. Is the magician. Okay. And the magician he represents. The sense of wisdom and insight and really transformation and in a relationship, a man that is tapped into this magician archetype. He is going to be offering guidance and mentorship. He is somebody that seeks to really understand the deep dynamics that are at play in the world.
And he also facilitates a deep sense of personal growth and transformation, both for himself and those around him. And he brings an element of creativity. And new perspective into a relationship. What does the magician look like sexually? He is going to be an intuitive understanding. Towards his partner's needs and desires. [00:14:00] He is going to have the ability to yes.
To. To really magically create. And I would even say transcend sexual experiences. He's going to be open to exploring the spiritual aspects of such sexuality, like really seeing beyond the physical and stepping into the deeper emotions, the deeper expansion of what's possible in sex. And. He will have this skill and building and actually kind of alchemizing and manipulating and moving sexual energy.
I actually think that this is a really. Under an understanding tantra that this is really potentially a man that is deeply in the practice of tantric sex. So he has the capacity to step into that sexual energy more fully. Who is a magician out in the real world. So let's say.
David is XAI. 38 year old psychologist. Okay. David has a deep understanding of human behavior. And he [00:15:00] uses that knowledge that he has to help. The clients that he works with transform their lives. That's what he does. And his personal relationships. He's really insightful. And he often, you know, he helps his friends see situations from new perspectives. He's that guy that. The people turn to for advice, for guidance for that ear. And he's constantly learning and bringing creative solutions to problems. And. You know, I kind of think of this, you know, I used a psychologist as an example, but this is, can be also like a lot of entrepreneurial. Qualities live within the magician. Magician arc types.
So problem-solving understanding people. I think marketing is a really interesting actually. Element here of how can you understand somebody and use that information to transform them, to help them make decisions. Let's say that you are hearing this and you're like, holy shit, I have no magician in me at all. And you want to step more into this part of yourself.
You want to be more in tune. You want to be more connected [00:16:00] to people, to the energy, to the depth of sex and connection. So I would say this. I started dedicate times really learning and expanding everything that, you know, Practice looking at situations from different perspectives and maybe taking. The more. Mental perspective on a topic that you like, or let's say for example, that you love to work out.
Maybe you're a really great warrior. How can you step more into this magician archetype within a piece of you that you enjoy, that you connect deeply with? Maybe you can start. Reading up on alternative. Training methodologies or looking at bio-hacking and learning as much as you can about that.
Taking something that you care about and bringing in. More of that learning more of that knowledge. And also developing your intuition. , there's a lot of incredible mindfulness practices that will help you get more in tune with your body. And really honestly not to like sell you on this, but a lot of the practices, [00:17:00] whether they're in their show notes or that we've talked about on other episodes, Are really powerful ways to actually step more into this magician archetype.
So looking at. That. Sex magic practice of using your body and your energy to move your desires. Not only from a sexual place, but from a manifestation place or looking at breath work to tap more into your present body. To show up sexually with your partner from a deeper, more profound. Source. So just throwing that out there, you know? No. And then lastly, we have the lover archetype, you guys.
Okay. So the lover, this is a man who really represents passion and sensuality and emotional connection. And in a relationship, I would say that a man who is embodying this lover archetype, Really expresses emotions freely and encourages deep, emotional intimacy. He appreciates beauty in all of its forms.
He [00:18:00] prioritizes connection and quality time, and he really brings this. Spontaneousness and this joy into relationships and. When you look at it from a sexual dynamic. The lover. He shines through and having this deep central awareness. And this profound presence during intimate moments. He has a strong focus on foreplay on central touch and building anticipation.
There is also a level of emotional vulnerability and really openness during sex. And he has an ability to really immerse himself into the pleasure of the moment.
Who is this man out in the world? Maybe the lover is you. Maybe your. 28 year old artist, and you're deeply in touch with your emotions how you express them. And you have this free expression through art and through relationships.
And through the words that you use in your passionate about life and about finding beauty in every moment. Maybe [00:19:00] in your romantic relationships, you're really attentive and affectionate and you place a priority on emotional and physical intimacy. And chances are, if you're listening to this you're you might be pulling out parts of this that are you, or maybe you're even recognizing parts. Of the other people in your life have men in your life that, you know, Bri. Through family or friends or what have you that you're like, Hey, oh yeah, my friend who is the painter, he is completely an artist and he is. Always. You know, wooing women with his ability to really appreciate their beauty and really show up and be with them centrally and caressing them in public.
That's the type of person that comes to mind when you're thinking about the love of rates. If you want to step more into this, if you want to tap more into this lover within you, that really is there somewhere he exists. If he is not fully present yet.
Practice expressing your emotions more openly and authentically.
And this does not have to be. This. Woo wee Greeley way of expressing your emotions, but sharing how you [00:20:00] feel and what you think about things in the world. Also cultivating an appreciation for beauty, really in all of its forms. And I think that, you know, a really great way to look at this as I have a couple of really good guy, friends that have a deep love for nature. And they are like the warrior king arch type, I would say.
And then they also have this profound love for nature. Like they can appreciate. The trees and the beauty of just being out in the world and really sit in that. And I think that is a great expression of this lover archetype. Or maybe it's building a deep appreciation for the beauty of a woman. And like sitting with her and just appreciating the beauty of how she looks or falling in love with music or art or. Fucking ceramics.
Go make some shit, you know, so finding an element of art and an element of beauty to bring into your life. And then also. Making a practice of being fully present in your interactions with other people, [00:21:00] which will, I think. Really nurture your capacity for empathy and emotional connection.
So simply instead of thinking. How can I be more emotionally connected to people? Think, how can I just be more present in the moment? Because when you're more present in the moment, it will be easier for you to emotionally connect and for you to have more empathy or compassion. By simply being present. Okay.
So that is the overview of all of the four different archetypes. I hope that it's been. Brewing some thoughts inside you of who you aren't, who you want to be more of, who you maybe want to be less of. And it's important to understand actually that these arc types, they really do not exist in isolation.
You are not. Fully just one. I mean, I think some people can lean that way and it isn't always necessarily a healthy way of being, and I really wanted to share this because a well-rounded man is going to embody aspects of all four of these archetypes and really drawn different energies as needed. And I think the cool thing about this is [00:22:00] as you look at building these four arc types up within yourself, it basically gives you more choice. By having more connection to these four aspects of yourself, you're going to have more options and more choice of how you want to show up in certain situations. And really the key is to develop an integrate. All of these aspects of masculinity into yourself.
Let's say that in a healthy relationship, right? You could see these archetypes kind of play out like this. So the king energy is going to provide the stable foundation and create a sense of security and direction for the relationship. And then the warrior is going to really protect this foundation.
That's been built and face the challenges and maintain the boundaries as you move forward. The magician is going to bring a sense of wisdom and facilitate growth and helping the couple to navigate complex emotional territories. And finally, then the lover. Is like that cherry on top, he ensures that passion and intimacy enjoy remained central to the relationship. So you can [00:23:00] really see how that plays out in a relationship dynamic.
And then Lee guys let's talk about sex. So sexually. Man is going to be able to draw on that king energy to confidently lead and create a safe space. That warrior energy is going to passionately pursue his desires. And then that magician energy. Kimberly intuitively read and respond to his partner's needs.
And finally that lover. That lover energy is going to fully immerse be immersed in the central pleasure of the experience. Who. I get excited. When I think about a man like that. And I've relationship like that. It's so powerful. And. I really want to know in recognizing the power that comes with being in these arc types and being really embodied in all four of them, that there are, that there is actually the capacity for these archetypes to show up in immature or really dark.
I would say shadowy [00:24:00] ways. To be aware of. So let's say that, you know, for example, there's a king who is really immature. That's going to show up like a tyrant or a weakling. You know, if it's the warrior shadow, he's going to turn up in a masochistic in a sadistic way. And I'm not necessarily talking about like a BDSM way, thinking like a really. Angry. Rage full. Sadistic way. And then a magician, he could be really distorted and really use his gifts to manipulate or actually to detach.
And then an immature lover really, you know, he becomes addicted to pleasure or on the flip side of that, he can really fear intimacy. So looking at these shadow aspects is going to be the first step in you figuring out how to integrate the arc types in a more healthy way. So chances are, there might be a piece of you that is kind of living in the shadow or living in an immature state within one of these arc types.
So. Reflecting with [00:25:00] yourself of how am I showing up this way? And. Look, I will say this. There is truly nothing sexier than having strong, unique pairings within yourself. You know, having a surprising, complimentary pairing a personality traits, you know, so a man that's driven and works hard, but can then turn around and be really playful, like a kid or a man who can command a room and. Then as able to go home and settle into quietly reading a book, you know, think about it.
You probably are attracted to women that have really opposite pieces of them. You know, a woman who can be independent and also allows you to take care of her. Yeah. Or a woman who is intelligent and smart, but she has this immense humility or a woman who is wildly, seductive and equally playful.
When you have these unique pairings, when you have these kinds of extremes, it shows you that not only can a [00:26:00] woman, for example, be really seductive. And on the flip side, really playful, but in order to reach those extremes, there's also this massive rainbow in between that leads from one to the other, and she will embody all of those as well.
And so thinking to yourself, how can I expand all of these arc types within myself because if you relied too much on one of your personality traits, or if you relied too much on being in one of these archetypes, Begin to consider ways that you can embody the other side of the coin, because you will be much more likely to get a girl hooked on you.
If you do that, and the more you embrace the different sides of your character and have the courage to have. Those unseen parts of you show up to the party now. And then the more likely it is that she will see you for the incredible one of a kind man that you really are. So remember that the goal isn't necessarily to perfectly embody these arc types at all times. It's really about expanding your range of [00:27:00] expression. And bringing more depth and richness to your sexual experiences, to your connections and. I really encourage you to take a moment. Reflect on these archetypes and how they show up in your life, how they show up for you in the bedroom. Who are you being? Are you being the lover? Are you being the warrior? Are you being a magician? Who are you being and how can you bring in these other pieces along with you the next time that you're intimate, the next time that you're having sexy sex? And also which one do you resonate with?
Which one challenges you? I love this which one? And this is totally a warrior. A warrior thought, but which of these arc types feels like the, you think would be the biggest challenge for you to step into? That's the one that you want to work on? Take a moment, make that decision right now and start acting on it.
Thank you guys. So much for joining me on this exploration of the four. Masculine archetypes. Until next time, [00:28:00] send me a message. Let me know what archetype you are. Let me know what archetype you're working on. Building. I want to know that part of you. And if you have any questions, if you have a story, if you have a topic that you want addressed on the show, please do not forget to submit that.
And you can head on over to the naked connection.com backslash question and get that on here. So you can be featured on an episode with myself or a guest. I have so much love for you and I cannot wait to hear how expanding these archetypes goes for you. Sending you all of my love.
And until next time. Let's get some. [00:29:00]