What Women REALLY Want in a Man: 4 Proven Traits
What do women really want?
In this episode, you will learn 4 key drivers that attract a woman to men. Kirsten answers a listener's question about what women are drawn to in men.
Whether you are single, searching for insight on how to attract your dream woman, or are in a relationship and wanting to boost your girl's desire to be with you, this episode is for you. Tune in to learn natural ways to boost your attractiveness with women while enhancing your overall well-being.
Key Topics:
01:32 Understanding Female Cravings
02:48 The Importance of Height and Physical Attributes
07:42 Boosting Testosterone: Natural Ways to Enhance Attraction
09:26 The Power of Music and Artistic Expression
14:11 The Science of Smell and Attraction
18:32 Status and Financial Stability
22:17 Leveraging Biology for Success in Love
SUBMIT YOUR QUESTION: https://www.thenakedconnection.com/question
Flure Dating: Made for Pleasure - https://flure.com/nc
Ready to totally transform your sex life?
Visit https://www.thenakedconnection.com/guide and get your FREE orgasmic breathwork practice guide.
This guide is here to help you experience more power, sensitivity, aliveness, and pleasure in just 10 minutes.
Boost your next naked moment!
Visit http://thenakedconnection.com/foria and try the Intimacy Massage Oil with CBD to intensify you and your partner’s arousal and pleasure.
Get Turned On FASTER
Visit thenakedconnection.com/mood to try the plant-based and research-backed Sex Magic supplement from MOOD and use code NAKED for 15% off your order!
Episode Transcript
[00:00:00] How often have you looked at a woman and thought to yourself, What do you want?
This idea that if only you knew what this woman wanted. You would be able to crack the code. To get her to finally be with you, to sleep with you. Maybe even love you. And this question isn't only for single guys, right? This is also for those of you that are in a relationship. I know you think to yourself, Even after all of these years after all of these months together, sometimes. I just don't know what she wants. What is she attracted to?
What does she desire? Well, in this episode, we are covering four key drivers that attract a woman, two men, the science behind them, and what you can do to take action with this important information.
[00:01:00]
Welcome back to the naked connection. This is the show that supports driven men to reach sexual mastery and build deep connections. It's Kiersten your soon to be licensed therapist and. We are mixing things up a bit here today and doing a little question of the week.
So as you know, you can submit your questions, stories, and topics that you want to have answered on the show. Uh, the naked connection.com backslash question. And I will be answering some of these questions on the show.
So for today's a question, but listener Pierre wrote in this.
To truly understand the feminine on a fundamental level. What would you reckon? Compel a woman to crave a man. What is it that she feels is itching or missing almost to the point of addiction when it comes to med?
So because of this question, and I know this is something that comes up so often as wanting to know [00:02:00] what it is that a woman wants. Connecting with peer. I thought this would be the perfect first question to answer with everyone here today.
And I'm going to share with you four key drivers that attract a woman, two men. And how you can actually tap into this and bring really your dream woman more to you, or even inspire that special someone that's already in your life to want you even more.
I think that if we can understand the underlining drivers of these attributes, that women crave, that is truly the gold of what really matters. Of course, we want to know what women want, but I think knowing why they want it is far more important and actually creates greater opportunities for you. To succeed. So the first one, and this is always controversial and something that no one ever wants to hear. It has to do with size in [00:03:00] particularly height. So studies show that if a man is seven inches taller than a woman, she will be 10 times more likely to swipe on him on a dating profile. And funny side note here, men care about height too.
If a woman is seven inches shorter than a man. That man is three times more likely to swipe on her dating profile and we're using dating profile stats in this particular example, just as a quick underlining indicator of. What we're attracted to what we're looking for in the dating world, in the romantic world.
And you might be wondering why did women care so much about height? It's so superficial while. This is where the science and the biology gets to come in. Tom men are more successful in all areas of life. I mean, if you look at the stats about height and looking at CEOs of companies or looking at height in terms of. Salary. It's all connected. And I think [00:04:00] that part of this comes down to the reality that. Women are innately, drawn to men that they feel can protect them, that they feel can make them feel safe and that they can have this sense of being held and cared for.
And you're really protected, nurturing way. A taller larger man is innately, going to be able to on the surface, provide that level of protection. So looking at the biology of this, it comes down to testosterone. Women look for men who have on average 15 times up to a hundred times more testosterone than them and testosterone is often really highly linked with height.
So in puberty, when you've got that boost of testosterone, that's when those growth spurts come in. So. The taller a man, the higher, the perception of more testosterone and this doesn't end with just height. So some other physical features that really indicate this important attribute to women. Also looks at hands. Women love a good [00:05:00] large hand. Y, and it isn't always necessarily related to thinking that, oh, the larger hand, the hands or the larger the feet, the larger than Dick. It's actually. About testosterone.
The size of a man's hands and feet are affected by exposure to testosterone and growth hormones during puberty. And interestingly again. Women's feet sizes are also influenced by estrogen levels. So I think that there's this subconscious piece here about perhaps why there are so many foot fetishes out there. Feet are connected to our sex hormones and whether we have high levels of testosterone or high levels of estrogen, it's all related and exposed in our feet.
So innately. Attraction to larger hands, larger feet. Could be related to. Someone sex hormone levels. Another feature that indicates high testosterone levels is [00:06:00] a larger width to height, face ratio. And this is actually directly related to testosterone levels and what women are statistically more drawn to.
So if you think chiseled jaw line, a more square facial form. That's going to be something that innately women find more attractive. And again, it all comes back to that level of testosterone pumping through a man. What women are physically attracted to is majorly related to testosterone drivers. You might be wondering who gives a fuck about testosterone?
Well, it's a massive protection component to existence. Fundamentally men are subconsciously attracted to women for their fertility. Potential and women are attracted to men for their protection and providing potential. And testosterone levels and all of the physical features that indicate that. Women find really attractive. So. What do you do with this information other than being annoyed, that maybe you have to lie about [00:07:00] your height on a dating profile to get a woman to swipe on you. Well, you can naturally boost your testosterone levels. Lift heavy things go to the gym.
Chop woods, spend time with other men's studies actually show that the more a man engages with other men, the higher his testosterone levels become. Drink less alcohol. Did you know that when you drink alcohol within the first 30 minutes of that first drink, your testosterone levels drop. There are so many things that we can naturally do.
And in this world, in our environment and in our habits and lifestyles that directly influence. Our sex hormones. So. For if you're a man and you're wondering, how can I boost my testosterone? There's so much out there for you. These are just a couple of examples. And while you weren't going to necessarily change your face, shape, or grow a couple of inches. You are going to shift what is physiologically happening in your body?
Boosting testosterone levels, [00:08:00] which. Nately attract more women to you. And I think more importantly, Leave you feeling better about yourself along the way?
All of the actions that drive testosterone are incredibly healthy. Think about it, exercising more spending time with more men. Drinking less alcohol, getting better sleep. Reducing your cortisol levels. Reducing your stress. Eating healthier foods. It, it all comes back to you. Not only having higher testosterone, but feeling better and living healthier and experiencing more in life.
[00:09:00] The second attribute is a little bit of a lesser known one. And it's actually surprisingly music.
If a man is holding a guitar in a photo or a video on his dating profile, he is twice as likely to receive requests for dates from women. Now, I'm not saying go borrow your friend's guitar and pose in a photo. But. There's something really important to this here. That's a really strong message that women are drawn to something specific in a man.
Now, Darwin actually claimed that sexual selection is closely related to the development of music, because if you think about it, There are so many species out there where they were men. You sound to [00:10:00] attract a mate. Male birds and insects seem to attract their mates. And it creates really kind of this idea of pay attention to me.
I am so healthy. I'm so talented. I am so confident that I have no issue making loud noise, that I have no issue exposing myself to potential predators. I won't back down. I won't shrink from danger in order to move you to pull you in. I just love looking at that from an evolutionary animal perspective of seeing what other species are doing to attract mates and how so often as humans, we do the same thing. Whether we're aware of it or not. Now. Music and arts in general is a beautiful way to connect with a woman. Through a different means. If you listened a couple of months back, I actually shared an episode about the FA four male archetypes. And one of them is the lover. Which is a man who [00:11:00] among other things cultivates a deep appreciation for beauty in all of its forms, in nature and art and people, and the beauty of a woman.
And this is a man who really prioritizes central experiences thinking. Food music, touch visual experiences, really looking at all of the arts in all of their forms. So. When you combine a protective man. Hello, testosterone. With. A man connected to some kind of art form.
Uh,
women go. Crazy. They go wild. Okay. They are dripping.
And we're ready for a man. But it's like this. So. What can you do with this information? Find something in the art world that you love and explore it more. Go to more concerts, go to theater shows, learn the instrument that you've always wanted to [00:12:00] pick up photography, take a pottery class. I mean, I will never forget.
I had a friend years ago who is dating a man who did pottery and she would go to his studio where he would use. I don't remember it it's called the round table and he would be spinning these bulls and these. Plates and mugs and innate. Pieces with his hands and she just fell in love with it. And I think in part, it goes back to this piece of witnessing somebody that's creating. Creating art. And even thinking about it now, from that more animalistic sense, it's like, if this man is bent over this spinning table and he's making this bull, he isn't consumed and concerned with what's happening behind him.
Like he is. So in the experience of creating something beautiful, Potentially to give to her or to give to his community. Without being worried about [00:13:00] fighting and being. So in the experience of the art that he comes to life in a different way. Do, whatever it is that you want to do in this area of life. And I think a woman will appreciate it.
And you might too. And again, this comes back to yes, obviously. If you were in to engage in some kind of music or artistic creation that may pull a woman in, or may pull your partner closer to you, she might see a piece of you that she's never seen before. And also, you're going to find out about yourself in a new way.
You're going to experience any part of life that you haven't before. And that is no detriment to anybody. So the third piece. This one is so wild to me. It is smell. And I will say that this one is a little bit out of control. But hear me out. Studies have been done where [00:14:00] women smell the shirts of men that they don't know.
And they rank this smell in order of most attractive, to least attractive. So there's one particular study where they had men wear the same shirt every day for five days, and then they put it in a bag. And then women were sat in a room and exposed to these bags with shirts in them. And then they would rank which one they were most attracted to, which one?
They felt like smelled the best. And what they found in these studies is that women found the most attractive smell of the men that were genetically the least. Like them. So. Our bodies are genetically designed to want to stay away from incest. Our bodies are designed to want to stay as far away from incest as possible. And smell is the way that we do that. So without getting too into the science of it, there are a few genetic markers that actually build the immune system. And the more these genes [00:15:00] differ, the more the woman was drawn to the man's smell. It's so fascinating and it's so wild to me. So, what can you do? Well, While you can't change your immune system in your genetic makeup. You can do a couple of things you can meet as soon as possible.
If you're a single and you're on a dating app, or you're talking to someone online, maybe they slid into your DMS. You slid into theirs, whatever it is, find a way to meet this person sooner rather than later. Give yourself the opportunity to, yes, literally smell one another. And see if there's an attraction. I, and I would say kiss 50 million bacteria pass from mouth, from mouth during kissing, and this reveals. The level of sex hormones, a person carries, which I believe that. Are probably something that you care about just as much as she does.
So meet, get to [00:16:00] be around each other. I think that, especially in looking at. If you're a single and you're dating and you're meeting people online, you're using the dating apps. Get together as quickly as possible. And allow your physiological nature to help vet one another out. And I would also add a caveat here, and this might be a little bit of a controversial thing for me to bring up, but I would really consider what medication she is taking. Birth control pills actually interfere with a woman's smell preference.
So in these studies, they actually looked at women that were also taking birth control pills, and they found that the women that were using contraception. We're actually found to be more attracted to the men that were closer to her genetic makeup. And there's some speculation on this, but really what it comes down to is that when a woman is pregnant, Which is, you know, birth control that really mimics that within a woman's body physiologically. In that [00:17:00] state, she doesn't need to be looking for a mate.
In fact, She wants to be closer to those that are closer to her genetic makeup, because they will be more likely to be helpful in raising her offspring with her. I'm not saying to ask a woman to stop taking birth control or to only date women who aren't it's. Simply something for you both to know. There are definitely cases where couples have gotten together.
They've married and then they've decided to start having kids and she stops taking birth control and suddenly she isn't attracted to her partner any longer. So these are just pieces of information to help you in understanding not only what it is that you're looking for, that you're attracted to, but really understanding what's driving a woman's attraction. Along the way.
With that, The fourth is. Another painful one. Status.
Women are drawn to men that have equal or higher status than them. There's [00:18:00] actually a concept. This is actually a concept called hyper gummy where women date and engage across and up in life. So whatever their education, their income, their statuses, they look for men that are at, or above their playing field in all of these avenues.
Now. This is really, can be really frustrating. To sit in the experience of knowing that women are looking for men that have higher status than them. And I feel for you. I do. And I want to share an example of, of a conversation that I very recently had with a woman.
She had just gone on a date with a man and
she said that he was kind, he was in friendly. He was really engaging. They had a good time together. This is a man that was in his mid forties. And she said to me, I'm really embarrassed to say this out loud. And I hate that I'm bringing this up. But I feel concerned [00:19:00] about his finances. And she said that when they met. She saw him driving up in the parking lot.
And he was in this really old beat up car. And she was like, you know, I drive a, not that nice car, but like this one was kind of next level. She's like to the point where, when he hit a speed bump, his trunk opened. And she's like, I just kinda got the sense that he wasn't. He didn't really have things figured out for himself yet. And she's like, I hate to, I hate that.
That influences my desire to be open to seeing him again, but I worry that he won't be in a place to have a family anytime soon. I see both sides to this, you know, on the one side someone's bank account or someone's status, doesn't define their capacity to love and to nurture and to be a good partner. And on the other hand, There's this aspect of a woman who is driven to have babies and would be really ill advised to not take into [00:20:00] account that this man has no money.
And this is really, really a hard place for anyone to be.
So. It comes down to, what can we do with this information? What can we do with the reality that yeah. Just like how you want to innately be drawn to women that are fertile, that are young, that are lashes, that can carry children. Like that's so much of what drives. Attraction. On the flip side of that, the same is true for women.
They're looking innately for a man that can provide and protect. So what do we do with this information?
In this case. Can invest in yourself. Care about your career care about being financially stable for yourself and your future. Spend time building a financial plan, investing budgeting do work that lights a fire under you. [00:21:00] Build a strong network of people around you. All of these things, yes. Will shift your status and the way that you're attracting women and the women that are attracted to you.
And also. It's going to shift your life experience as well. I say all of this, not just to attractive women. I say all of this for the betterment of your entire life and wellbeing. UN fortunately or not. These are four of the massive components that are driving a woman's attraction. Testosterone levels. Your genetic makeup. Your connection to music or art. And really a more soulful experience within yourself, I think is an aspect of that as well.
And then yes, your status, where are you? In your life, in your finances, in your stability.
So for those of you that have heard all of this and are now [00:22:00] thinking women are shallow Golddiggers who just want status and tall men.
Perhaps consider that a woman's biology is driving them to look for safety and protection for themselves and for the potential children that they would have with you. And that that is actually. Quite incredibly wise of them to do.
In our modern world that can look at times really twisted. And yet there is a choice here. And take this reality, this information and choose to leverage it for not only your chances of success in love, but also for. You to expand yourself. Hope that this has been helpful. Thank you so much, Pierre, for submitting this thoughtful question.
And my guys, may you keep the questions coming? I'll be doing more episodes like this. So submit those questions, those topics, those [00:23:00] stories. At the naked connection.com backslash question. It's in the notes below.
Take a moment hit that subscribe button, join the other epic men in this community and until next time. This is Kiersten signing off you guys get after it and let's get some.